Did You Find Everything All Right?


Last weekend the cashier asked this question in a sporting goods store. Many chain stores require their clerks to ask, so I’m sure you’ve been asked it too. What happens when you give a negative answer?

Most of the time I don’t bother to respond but I decided to tell her the truth, “No, you don’t have the color and weight of boxing gloves I wanted.” She completely ignored me. No response was given as she rang up our items.

Now, my husband and I had found what we came to the store to purchase. I wasn’t really intending to buy new gloves even though I honestly think my current pair could knock someone out with their smell. But I probably would have grabbed a pair if the right kind were in stock. The clerk was like a robot asking the question and proceeding. There was no mechanism for her to report what I said to management. There was no offer to speak with someone about ordering a pair. There was nothing, nothing at all.

I shouldn’t have been asked. The company should not ask if they have no intention of doing anything with the answer.

Businesses and organizations need to remember this when they proceed with social media. Social networks are a dialogue. You need to think about how you will respond. Who will take action? What will they say? Ignoring is not an option!

July 14th, 2011 | Tags: , , | Category: All My Writing | 3 comments

A New Year Lesson From Outer Space

Over the weekend my family visited the Air and Space Museum on the Mall. For some overpowering reason, I wanted to contemplate the universe as we embarked on another year. Acknowledging the vastness of space sometimes helps to put our lives in perspective. We are part of something so much larger than our everyday instances.

Spending time learning about the Milky Way fit with my intentions but then I found myself carefully studying every fact in a telescope exhibit. “Oh, Cindy” I thought, “back to something you can touch while thinking about mechanics.” Why did I bring myself down to Earth?

Unable to stop reading, I stumbled across a picture of a woman. She must have done something remarkable to be featured.

Hmmm, for years she dedicated herself to studying tiny little dots in the hope of finding miniscule changes. Henrietta Swan Leavitt starred at photographic plates taken of the same part of the sky on different nights. She painstakingly compared each star to find a “minute brightness change” that would reveal a variable star. She found 2,400 of them which was about half of those known at the time.

I couldn’t do that.

But, because she discovered the link between the brightness and length of brightness cycle, she found what astronomers had been desperately seeking. She gave them the information they needed to measure distances in space.

You never know when your work will make a difference.

Although my intent was to think about the universe beyond our human existence, my lesson involved the benefits of dedicating yourself to a pursuit over time. Instead of a vast focus, I was taught the benefits of a meticulous concentration.

Often in this quickly-changing fickle society, people seem to admire bigger, better, and newer. In order to advance, we need people plugging away at the same little tasks. There’s no shame in ongoing dedication as long as you continue to give it your absolute best effort.

January 3rd, 2011 | Tags: , , | Category: All My Writing | Leave a comment

I Can’t Believe I Didn’t Know It Was Stress

Watch out when the stress blows in

A few months ago I started to feel sick at work with a headache. Convinced I was catching my son’s cold, I decided to go out for a run anyway. Miraculously, I felt better.

On a few other occasions this winter I’ve felt terrible. Convinced I’d be sick in bed within hours, I dragged myself out for my late-night kickboxing class then recovered. I’ve been telling everyone how my exercise must be boosting my immune system because I never wind up getting sick.

With the blizzards, I couldn’t travel to the gym. For six days my stomach was upset. I enjoyed my time with my family while trying to keep the ball rolling for a major fundraiser. With Washington DC snowed in for a full week, the hours were dwindling before the big event. Even though I had been ill for several days, I forced myself to an early-morning kickboxing class as soon as the roads were clear. When I came home I started to research my symptoms in fear of cancer. A short time later I was completely better.

When I was reading the medical book, the first cause of my symptoms was typed in bold letters: stress.

I had spent a week feeling sick because of stress. I still can’t believe I didn’t recognize it. My suffering had me worrying about a major disease. With my conscious effort to stay healthy, I can’t believe I didn’t know what was happening to me.

The realization that I was suffering from stress every time I thought I was sick floored me.

When I interviewed for my nonprofit job, I was asked how I handle stress. Fundraising under tight schedules with part-time hours and a strong desire to succeed is recognized for the stress it creates. Yoga and running on a daily basis had been a strong foundation to staying healthy but with work taking up additional hours, late-night kickboxing had to be added. Apparently, I can’t live without all these stress reducers.

But not all stress is bad. The American Institute of Stress describes it this way:

Increased stress increases productivity – up to a point, after which things rapidly deteriorate, and that level also differs for each of us. It’s much like the stress or tension on a violin string. Not enough produces a dull raspy sound and too much an irritating screech or snaps the string – but just the correct degree of stress creates a beautiful tone.

There are many signs of stress.  HelpGuide.org lists the physical ones as aches and pains, diarrhea or constipation, nausea, dizziness, and loss of sex drive. Keep a look out for these in your daily life.

Without intervention, my situation is making me physically ill. With this awareness, I need to make sure I find the ways to keep a good balance and stay healthy. Hopefully the weather or injuries won’t prevent me again.

I’m feeling a need to run right now.

February 22nd, 2010 | Tags: , , , | Category: All My Writing, Health and Wellness | Leave a comment

Impassioned Teams Win Success

 

My entire work career has been spent in nonprofit organizations. Every one of my workplaces has had women in the majority functioning as team with complete collaboration. Titles never mattered. No one ever tried to take credit for group efforts. It has always been about the results.

Last week Third Sector Connector had a wonderful list, 17 Hallmarks of Community Change Agents. A few jumped off the screen:

  • They value team, and they have an understanding that attracting, retaining, and supporting a strong team is essential to delivering high quality services.
  • Rather than building silos and rigidly adhering to job descriptions, they encourage ad-hoc teams, cross-training and shared responsibility.
  • They encourage, value and provide professional development, mentoring and coaching.

You may notice a common thread. The teamwork is blurred. Roles shift and change. People are appreciated. Everyone offers their best because no one is taking credit or calling the work their own. Success stems from a group effort by qualified and valued members.

Over the years, my leadership style has always been based on such impassioned teams. Accomplishments are always paramount to the role I play.

A quote by Harry S. Truman has resonated with me and reminded me of what’s important:

You can accomplish anything in life provided that you do not mind who gets the credit.

It’s so true. This has always been my way of life. For me it is never about the “glory”. I want to improve the lives around me by leading and growing community for the common good.  I don’t believe in saying “I”, it’s always “We”. It’s actually painful for me when I can’t bring people together and I have to watch endeavors wither.

So I’m pleased to be reminded of how real, positive change can be attained.

February 2nd, 2010 | Tags: , , , , | Category: All My Writing | 3 comments

Same Story, Different Day

At the pool today, I spoke with the husband of a friend. He talked about how it was really getting her down to try and enter the workforce again after being home with the kids. I told him how I had started a second blog on this subject (I participate in a community blog for our city). He said we should get together as a support group. As I stood there in the water, I realized there really was a need for all of us to talk.

Even if we find a job, most likely it will be below our capabilities. A recent interview for a position below the one I left ten years ago included anxiety by the interviewer over my computer skills. Ten to one odds my computer skills were far superior to hers and I had her job when I left, so in my mind…. ah, forget it.

Take a job below our skills to get back working? Just do something that’s fun even though it doesn’t pay? Hold out for the same type of job you left?

August 19th, 2007 | Tags: , | Category: All My Writing | Leave a comment

Are We All in the Same Place?

I just left my friend’s house and it’s very late. As we sat around in the backyard, I realized all three of us women were thinking about what to do next. One had a law degree and left after both superiors quit and she didn’t want their jobs, one tried to use that math masters degree but the girls came first, and I had been home with my boys for ten years. The sky was black because it was night and a storm was threatening. Did we have the same thoughts?

I spent four years getting a degree in philosophy because I thought that somehow it would all make sense, but it never has. For all time, we have tried to figure out what it all means and I’m not just referring to the challenge of raising a family and having kids. Do I think too much? Am I the only one that needs headsets and music to make it through the simplest of life’s tasks?

In high school I spent a great deal of time wishing I could just be a waitress in a New Jersey diner and be done with my life choices. After all, both my parents had never finished high school and college was an extremely foreign land. I’m well past this now but I still wish it were easier.

What will really make us happy career-wise? Why do we keep asking this question and never seem to get an answer?

August 12th, 2007 | Tags: , | Category: All My Writing | Leave a comment