When I was a child and I exaggerated a story, I remember my father calling me on it. “Did that really happen?” “Are you “telling stories”? It was code for lying because at some point, if you are telling a story and the facts aren’t true, you are lying. Storytelling has a [...]]]>

Bending the truth

When I was a child and I exaggerated a story, I remember my father calling me on it. “Did that really happen?” “Are you “telling stories”? It was code for lying because at some point, if you are telling a story and the facts aren’t true, you are lying. Storytelling has a bad connotation.

Lately I see a lot of storytelling. As people market on social media, the truth becomes distorted. People want to blog with a good hook. But reality might not be that interesting, so the writer brings out the spices. If you know the person, you might be disappointed.

Of course this has always been true in advertising. My favorite example comes from The Christmas Story when Ralph goes to such great lengths to obtain a decoder ring from Little Orphan Annie only to find out the secret code is an advertisement. His disapproval is obvious and we all know we’ve learned the same lesson. My sons have learned the hard way with dreamy toy advertisements which turn out to be nothing. Over the years I’ve warned them never to never believe advertising claims until they can be checked. This is why social media has grown. We want to benefit from other people’s experiences.

But can we trust everyone?

If you know someone closely or have been involved with a situation in a blog post, you might realize it isn’t quite true. The post might be an exaggeration when you know the true story.  When you discover inconsistencies, you never really trust the writer again.  If you find yourself thinking “That sounds good”, you immediately remember it’s probably storytelling and discard it as false.

I strive for authenticity in my writing. I’m not out to brand myself. I have nothing to sell, no image to propagate. When I communicate, I strive not to tell stories. I want to be trusted.

When you are reading a blog post, marketing materials, or even a status update, you need to be aware of the writer’s history and motivation. If it sounds too good to be true, most likely it isn’t.

We all need to keep our eye on the truth – and stop storytelling - if we are to be truly successful.

Fifteen years ago I planted these trees with the youth in the AmeriCorps program I administered. We spent the day working side-by-side with a group of mentally-disabled adults. For years I’ve wondered about the trees whenever I passed by the area. This week, in need of sustenance, I searched for their location.

Perhaps I needed to physically [...]]]>

Fifteen years ago I planted these trees with the youth in the AmeriCorps program I administered. We spent the day working side-by-side with a group of mentally-disabled adults. For years I’ve wondered about the trees whenever I passed by the area. This week, in need of sustenance, I searched for their location.

Perhaps I needed to physically see a result, to see time pass and circumstances change. We planted them a long time ago, but my years with the AmeriCorps program provide some of my fondest work memories. I loved working with the youth and helping people all over Montgomery County.

I wondered how much growth to expect in 15 years. This is about what I pictured. The area was a little grass field when we visited, dug, planted and shared lunch together. The trees are so solid today, beyond my reach.

Maybe I just needed to physically see results. When I changed jobs from a national environmental policy organization to a local nonprofit developer, I realized I preferred to be able to physically touch accomplishments. Walking through apartments was so much more fulfilling than reading about a report sent to the Hill. Perhaps I’m all about action and not policy.

Lately I’ve been thinking about the next phase in my life. My husband laughs at me because I keep saying, “This is it. Whatever I decide to do next might be the last thing I get to do before retirement.” Apparently he doesn’t think I’m old enough to be worrying about this quite yet. He’s probably right, but as I inch closer to 50 next week, I’m feeling the time running out. 

In 15 years I’d like to think I will have grown whatever I decide to plant right now to be big and strong. I want to see mature trees.

Most of the time, it’s not easy to [...]]]> Last week I wondered. Why do I care about the historic preservation of a building? Why do I care if the affordable housing community is built? Why do I care that there are homeless people living on our streets? None of these outcomes will change my life directly.

Most of the time, it’s not easy to care. When you really care, you take action. For these types of issues, you are often in the minority. Others may care but not enough to take action. If you act, you feel like the lone voice in the wilderness.

Even if you do find like-minded supporters for certain issues, it’s still not easy. If you stick your neck out, the repercussions from a loud and angry crowd of NIMBYs can be devastating. When they resort to personal attacks or try to discredit you, caring can be painful. People tell me you have to be thick-skinned.

Nothing new here to those with any experience with campaigns or NIMBYs. But when it happens to you, it feels like the first time. It is new. When taken on a personal level, aggressive emails and public complaints feel like you are being bullied. Standing up to a bully takes strength. People tend to shy away from confrontation so the bullies, and NIMBYs, win.

Last Sunday I visited a church. The minister preached about what Jesus could have done with his life. He could have continued to heal all day or preach nonstop, but his ultimate actions resulted in a movement, Christianity. She talked about how two thousand years later we have many people preaching to others, healing in hospitals, and working for nonprofit institutions.

I’d never thought about my nonprofit career as a fulfillment of Jesus’ mission. Throughout my teen years whenever I prayed in church for guidance in my life, the message was always so clear and loud. You must help other people. I could never escape it.

When I decided to “stay home with the kids”, I swore I would not go back to nonprofit work. I have.

Along the way I spent all my free time volunteering to make my little corner of the world better – the schools, the scouts, the church, and the community. I can’t help myself.

Last week, I reported on a meeting where one side of an issue presented their response to the other side. Unbeknownst to me, many didn’t want that information out in the community. The person who made the presentation said my writing was accurate, but his opponents are trying to discredit my integrity and ability. That’s tough to bear since it’s not been done in public, nor in a way I can respond.

So, the minister’s words were comforting to me.

Rest assured that this experience does not make me think that I’m on some type of Christian mission when I volunteer or work. I wouldn’t be so bold or ignorant. I acknowledge two sides to every issue and portray both evenly. My training as a Philosophy major forced me to accurately portray arguments then analyze their strengths. Sometimes this meant admitting that the argument against my belief was stronger.

A force … a strength … pushes me each day and keeps me going, even when it is not in my best self-interest. This much is sure. Where it comes from may not be certain.

Love and caring does extend beyond personal interests. Why do you care?

Today someone must have forgotten a jacket on a log [...]]]> When I was out running a couple of weeks ago, I saw clothes in the woods and my first thought was that it must be a dead body. Now, why would I think that? I wondered if everyone would think they were seeing a dead body.