Today Facebook added the Subscribe button and she might not even need a campaign page.

If you want people to be able to Subscribe to your public posts on Facebook, then [...]]]>
Recently a friend running for public office confided that people were friending her on Facebook rather than liking her campaign page. “Not to worry”, I told her, “You are still reaching them from your personal page. Make sure to provide updates they have permission to see.”

Today Facebook added the Subscribe button and she might not even need a campaign page.

If you want people to be able to Subscribe to your public posts on Facebook, then you need to activate the subscribe button on your profile. When you do, the person will be able to see all your posts which you have chosen to make public.

With this feature, candidates, journalists, writers, actors, musicians, and other public figures can now have followers without following back.

Do you even need a separate Facebook page? Perhaps not as an individual, if you are savvy with friend lists. You won’t have to approve people as friends and won’t have to worry about the 5,000 friend limit.

However, you would want to keep or create a Facebook page if:

1.) You desire to create a distinct community.
2.) You need to provide information in tabs, such as contests.
3.) You want to track analytics.

If you decide to opt in to the Subscribe button, remember to post as “Public”. You can change whether a post is Public, Friends or Custom at anytime.

Facebook is also going to be creating “smart” friend lists for you soon based on your work, school, family, and city. This will also allow custom sharing and the new system will hopefully make creating friend lists easier.

The one thing about Facebook that always made it more real is that you both had to agree in order to be friends. The other social networks allowed you to follow people and they didn’t have to follow back. In this attempt to be all things to all people, Facebook is allowing you to “broadcast” as an individual. This seems like a step away from being friends. In some ways Facebook is becoming too much for any one person in its attemp to be everything to everyone.

While helping businesses and organizations through my newly-founded company, Online and In Person, LLC, I often talk about creating an online community to [...]]]> With Father’s Day on Sunday, I couldn’t stop thinking about my dad who died 23 years ago. In particular, I found myself thinking about his business, Community Service Station. His father had named the business “Community” and for decades it proved to be an extension of their friendships and involvement in our township.

While helping businesses and organizations through my newly-founded company, Online and In Person, LLC, I often talk about creating an online community to mirror the real life community of a business or organization. I emphasize that today’s social media marketing centers on community. To me, these aren’t idle words. Over the weekend I found myself comparing real life examples from my father’s business to interactions on Facebook pages.

1. People want to feel connected.

Community Service Station was a business but it was also a social hangout. Even the minister would spend time there (much to my grandmother’s chagrin). Most of us fill up the tank once a week or so. We are regulars at the gas station. My father’s customers would park and spend time sitting or standing around the office. Everyone knew each other and friendships developed.

Facebook creates a social space in much the same way where people can gather even when they aren’t doing business or supporting an organization. With Facebook they can check in to a place page (and eventually will be able to use the new Deal feature when it is offered). A Facebook page creates a place for a community to develop. Rockville Central, which I co-manage, is an excellent example of a Facebook community which means quite a lot to us.

2. People have a need to communicate with each other.

When people hung out at my father’s service station, they inevitably discussed every news story and local happening. When I met his regulars, they always knew what I was doing too.

On Facebook people comment or answer questions in much the same way. Even though they might not be friends on Facebook, they get to know each other and respond to each other. You can always stop by and comment and discuss a topic of interest while seeing who else is talking about a certain subject. People want to know what’s going on and share their opinions both in real life and on Facebook.

3. People want information

My dad obviously shared all sorts of information and answered many questions. Most of all he gave directions to people who were lost. These were not customers. Since he was situated off a ramp from the Lincoln Tunnel, these requests were never-ending and demanded a great amount of his time.

You share when using the social networks. On Facebook, businesses and organizations provide links, posts, and explanations to demonstrate their expertise without an expectation of compensation.

4. Businesses shouldn’t be afraid of humor

Take a look at the picture for this post. A newspaper article was taped onto my father’s desk “Boss George Goes Batty”. He loved to fool around and play practical jokes. He taught me that if I wanted to dish it out, I had to take it. Customers stopped in for a good laugh daily and he would play along. Community Service Station was a lively place for many men in my hometown.

On Facebook, you often post funny pictures, jokes, and amusing articles. These light-hearted links are a good break from your work or boredom. Sharing funny instances is one of the main uses of Facebook. Successful business owners and organizations show their lighter sides. Their pages run fun content and creative photos with a personal touch.

5. People like to volunteer and help.

My dad’s business was a work-study site for our high school. He hired young men and successfully trained them to be able to hold a job. Many of these boys didn’t even know how to look someone in the eye or shake hands. My father stepped up and dedicated the time. He always offered his property for car washes for local groups too. Signs and fliers were everywhere.

Businesses often “give back” to the community. After organizing service projects, Facebook brings people together to volunteer. Posts and events provide ways for customers to invite other like-minded friends to join them and increase the good in the world. Facebook is the modern day version of a flier on a telephone pole.

When I advise businesses and organizations on using social networks, I have my dad’s terrific example in my mind along with a good understanding of the importance of community. This background is combined with the technical know-how of successfully administering a Facebook page. To me, they fit together quite naturally. I help others feel the same.

Photo from ParMieux Adventures

Three years ago the Silver Spring Zombie Walk was started by a few local bloggers who decided to invite the readers to show up as zombies. Since I wanted to see the turnout inspired by these blogs and I always enjoy a fun time, my husband and I doned some white powder and makeup and ventured back to our old Silver Spring neighborhood. Doing our best to appear to be the [...]]]>

Photo from ParMieux Adventures

Three years ago the Silver Spring Zombie Walk was started by a few local bloggers who decided to invite the readers to show up as zombies. Since I wanted to see the turnout inspired by these blogs and I always enjoy a fun time, my husband and I doned some white powder and makeup and ventured back to our old Silver Spring neighborhood. Doing our best to appear to be the walking undead, we dragged our legs along and observed. Much to our delight, everyone was friendly, talked, and a great camaraderie grew. We were immediately part of the group even though we didn’t know anyone. The spontaneous gathering attracted between 100-200 people.

With big crowds lining the route this year, the 3rd annual event grew to over 2,000. If you’ve experienced the Zombie Walk, you know the reasons why. If you see the pictures and wonder why anyone would ever do this, here’s what’s going on! The Silver Spring Zombie Walk mixes interactive theater, creativity, community, and straight-up fun for a out-of-the-ordinary escapade.

Community. People come to meet friends and see their costumes/makeup. Almost everyone walks with someone they know. The main focus is being together to share the smiles and laughs. This is something you definitely talk about around the water cooler or over the backyard fence. This year, while looking for one group of friends, I lost track of my other friends. I found myself completely alone and the Zombie Walk had started. After looking around at the crowd, I realized I’d be fine by myself because everyone in this massive crowd was in this together. You become part of a broader community.

Creativity. Dressing and pretending to be a zombie allows participants to express themselves creatively. Being a zombie goes beyond a typical Halloween costume because you need a personality too. If you don’t perform on stage or act in some capacity, you most likely don’t have many imaginative outlets in your daily life. Being a zombie allows innovative commentary about our society, our flaws, and our icons. Santa, Yogi, Superman, and Politician Zombies populate the wonderful craziness of this pretend world.

Breaking The Norms. In society we share expectations of how we all should behave. Stepping outside these learned behaviors is a treat. During the zombie walk, our norms are disregarded which results in an exciting, unstructured event. The freedom to growl, scream, and flail at strangers is certainly an attraction, but seeing others behave as zombies is just as thrilling.

Interactive Theater. The Zombie Walk is a live, free, ad lib show. This year a Zombie Hunter walked with a working chainsaw protruding through an unsuspecting zombie. A pretend policeman used his club to defend the innocent crowd. A very authentic looking Jesus attempted to bless and save lost zombie souls. If you are a zombie, each step brings an opportunity to act. These on-the-spot performances are a rare occurrence worth experiencing. When in college I did gorilla theater to create awareness about Apartheid, so I’ve always loved spontaneous theater.

Spontaneity. During the first zombie walk, almost everyone in Silver Spring was unsuspecting. The blogs informed their readers but the general population was unaware. The unsuspecting reacted. Managers locked business doors and everyone moved away from the windows. A lone security guard bravely ran toward his office building doors to lock out the chaos. One woman in a restaurant window was visibly shaken. This year the event had regional newspaper coverage and WTOP was even given traffic advisories to avoid the area during the Walk. People at outside restaurant tables had obviously planned their ring-side perch. Only one woman reacted unfavorably to the knife through my head as we walked to the event early in the evening. Although a more institutionalized and planned event can quash some of the radical uniqueness, individual behavior can always bring it back.

Escapism. If people go to see zombie movies as a form of escapism, then a live zombie walk has to be even better. When you are at a zombie walk you escape in much the same way as when you see a movie, except you are the movie. Whether zombies snarl at you when you are standing on the sidewalk or you actively participate by defending yourself from zombies or you scrape by as the undead, you are automatically participating. When bystanders hold up their phones to take a picture and the zombies react, they are brought into the performance. With so many hundreds of zombies, it’s difficult not to begin to imagine the situation is real, or could be real, while the movie rolls all around you.

Shared Experience. A professional photographer commented, “I wish they would all put down their phones so I can get a picture.” Because of the great excitement and fun, people constantly took pictures and video. Even a police officer blocking an intersection for the Walk had a gigantic smile on his face as he snapped photos nonstop with his phone. You could tell he was having the best time on duty. The Zombie Walk is not something you can keep to yourself.

It’s impossible to have this much fun and keep it a secret. Step into the zombie world and live.

“That’s not what you said on Facebook, but I have a much better picture now.”

“Yeah,” I responded, “Lately I’ve been wishing I had a Secret Cindy account so I could be myself.”

Over the past couple of years [...]]]>

“That’s not what you said on Facebook, but I have a much better picture now.”

“Yeah,” I responded, “Lately I’ve been wishing I had a Secret Cindy account so I could be myself.”

Over the past couple of years I’ve happily added friends, acquaintances, political figures, co-workers, church members, family, and bloggers. I enjoy reading the news feed and keeping up with everyone, but I don’t know who I am now. When I post a status, who am I talking to?

I think some people don’t post status updates for exactly this reason.

I don’t have anything to hide. But if I posted the description of the motorcycle rally, people who don’t know me well might not understand my comment in the right context. I’ve always been overweight and have shopped at Lane Bryant. For many of the women, the rally was a chance meet up, but obviously not for me. If you aren’t a close enough friend to know how I struggle with my weight and have close friends who are gay, you might misjudge my status.

A friend didn’t like how Barack Obama, as a candidate, changed his demeanor for different audiences. When he first mentioned it, I realized I do the same. I don’t speak with a friend from another culture the same way I speak to a politician. My word choice, speed, and content are different. Both online and offline, I have a diversity of friends. Isn’t this true for all of us?

The situation on Facebook is perplexing, especially when professional contacts are included on your friend list. Obviously I would tell my family more intimate details about our weekend than I would share with a state delegate. Family want to hear about your kid’s accomplishments but to everyone else it’s bragging.

A friend who grew up down the street from me, couldn’t believe a current friend called me “Cindy” on Facebook. Didn’t I hate that? For 23 years I was against the nickname unless we were family or close friends, but as work blended with socializing, the distinction blurred. Eventually I felt silly telling people to call me Cynthia.

Now people from every part of my life are blended together on social networks. I’m very conscious of what each person thinks about every word I type. I’m concerned aboout what people will think.

I like sharing details of my life which helps me keep in touch and get to know others better, but it is difficult to speak to large, diverse audiences. Even though the message is the same, often the words need to be different. My status updates are generic and perhaps less fun, hence my wish for a wild and crazy Secret Cindy account because I like to joke around.

Who are you typing to?

I’m not by any means a public figure in my city but because of a local community blog, people know me. A city staff member once wrote, “We haven’t met (and I’d like to remedy [...]]]> Friends keep asking social etiquette questions about Facebook. For the most part, the interactions are unchartered. Although I advise the same good common sense as in real life, I’m now struggling with my own situation and how it will spill over.

I’m not by any means a public figure in my city but because of a local community blog, people know me. A city staff member once wrote, “We haven’t met (and I’d like to remedy that) but I am ______________; and I am in need a of a great big favor.” So we corresponded and I tried to help.

A short time later her city email showed up on my friend finder in Facebook and she accepted my offer of friendship. As I like to make personal contact with all my new friends, I wrote on her wall, etc.

But she has unfriended me. I find myself wondering why. She could have just blocked me from seeing her status updates.

Gosh this whole Facebook thing is getting complicated.

I’m sure the college kids are way past this. Truthfully, I don’t care. To me it’s a friendship lost. I liked her status updates and thought she was fun and wild like me.

But this is the communications person for my city. Since I blog about our city, I’ll have to interact with her in the future. What do I do?

1.) Directly send a message on Facebook and ask why? Did I do something wrong?
2.) Ask her why when I see her in person?
3.) Pretend nothing happened both in emails and in person?

Yes, we weren’t really friends, but I was hoping to get to know her better. Yes, I understand it is more of a professional relationship with me and you don’t want your crazy everyday observations to go public. Today she has 195 friends, not many by a younger person’s standards, but obviously more than just a close circle. Plus, she has kept my fellow community blogger as a friend as well as other city staff, so it’s just me kicked off the list.

It’s just Facebook right so I have to ignore it? I guess I will.

What kind of friends are these people? I see references to “online friends” and “cyber friends”. There are poems [...]]]> One local fellow wrote that he was glad we are “friends” on facebook.com. We have met at public meetings and I would talk to him, but it is very true that we are not friends in real life. Since his profiIe was up on facebook, I sent a friend request. In “fake life” we are now “friends”.

What kind of friends are these people? I see references to “online friends” and “cyber friends”. There are poems about cyber friends. Websites designed to help you make netfriendships. There is no expectation of knowing these people in the flesh. I know I’m not nearly the first person to wonder about this, but every day I see more ads and ways to connect online. To me it always seems like a waste of time, or a way to stop the loneliness, or an addiction to interacting. Even so, sometimes you do become closer to these people online, but is it really a friendship?

In my life around town, I know a lot of people, talk to a lot of people, and refer to a lot of people as friends. Because I volunteer in so many places, I have people to interact with in real life, so I’m having trouble processing these new cyberfriendships. Why do people do it? Is it a hopeful sign that we constantly want to reach out to strangers in this world? To me it feels like we are on a path to the oneness of death by joining together beyond the physical world. Now that’s too heavy, but this internet world does swirl around me. It can also disappear with the push of a button.

My disapproval seems to be at the falseness of the online friends. It’s like some type of hobby where you collect things, except in this case it’s people’s profiles. You learn things about people that you wouldn’t if you were say … just neighbors. Sometimes the information is too personal and directed at others but you are exposed to it. Most of the time people are putting their best foot forward or simply promoting themselves.

Online friends can give advice but they aren’t going to be able to help you move or water your plants when you are away. You can exchange ideas but the friendship isn’t real. These new kind of relationships depend on the amount of time you can spend on the laptop, as it sits right here on the counter while I dash around doing chores. Sometimes it feels more like an addiction which is usually when I stop.

Will I be better friends in real life with my “friend”. We’ll see.

For those women out there who have myspace accounts, you may know about the propositions. Often they are from men without [...]]]> Today I discovered a myspace account. It belongs to a friend who is married with a kid. It states that he is Single and a Leo. He used a different name “Hugh” but the correct hometown. I don’t think he’s THAT much younger than me but let’s not quibble about that claim. There’s no picture.

For those women out there who have myspace accounts, you may know about the propositions. Often they are from men without pictures that want to start an email correspondence. Some are from places far away and some are from your metro area. I’ve always suspected that the ones that live far away are not that far away.

I wonder about these men. I’m very clear about being married but my husband always says that I’m worth a shot by these guys. They “like my smile”. Think I’m “intelligent like them”. I seem “fun and full of life”. They really would “enjoy talking to me”. One even admitted to a bad marriage and thought mine might be bad too. At least he was honest about wanting to have an affair. My suspicion was that he was someone I knew.

I’m in it for the bands. Really! My niece set me up so I could follow and promote bands. I was a college radio station disc jockey. I love music and wish we would have had myspace twenty years ago. But hey, the internet has killed college radio stations. Every single person has access to all the music so we don’t need someone to play all the new, unknown stuff for us. Come to think of it, thank goodness we didn’t have the internet because I loved that microphone!

Back to my friend with the fake myspace. He hasn’t touched it in more than a year. What did he try? Did he send a few messages? Did he just think about it? It’s not like Facebook where you need to have an account to see other people’s pages, plus he lied so there’s more going on.

All marriages have their ups and downs. I know his wife and have a feel for their marriage. It’s just so engrossing to finally have proof about one of these myspace guys. Was he drunk late at night? Why hasn’t he erased it?

To me, myspace is like being out at a bar, which is probably why I love it so much. There’s a band, a bunch of people who want to have a good time, and someone sends over a drink. Sorry, I’m just here for the music and I’m married but I understand because I look like I’m having a good time. No harm done.

However, I’ve been naïve about all of my extramarital affair options on such sites as: http://www.marriedcafe.com/, http://www.housewivesmatchonline.com/, http://www.discreetadventures.com/, or http://www.meet2cheat.com/.

With statistical claims that 60% of married men and 40% of married women admit to having affairs, this is big business.

If you are truly interested, why not just go full force with one of these sites? Why even bother with myspace? Will it be more real if you find the woman on your own and start a cyber dialog? Can you justify it by saying that it “just happened”? You “weren’t really looking just chatting online”?

I’m not going to mention the myspace find to him, but I’m curious. I considered asking to friend him so he knows that he has been found out, but he might take that the wrong way. I finally know one of these guys!