I never thought elimination diets were a good idea. My motto has always been “everything in moderation”. When I lost my weight my goal was to make changes in my diet which could last a lifetime. But during a personal revolution, you must shed your perceptions of the world and try those things you never thought you would.

For three days I only ate fruit. I spent the time flip flopping. I was surprised when I [...]]]>

I never thought elimination diets were a good idea. My motto has always been “everything in moderation”. When I lost my weight my goal was to make changes in my diet which could last a lifetime. But during a personal revolution, you must shed your perceptions of the world and try those things you never thought you would.

For three days I only ate fruit. I spent the time flip flopping. I was surprised when I wasn’t hungry then bouts of hunger would come over me. Fruit only goes so far. Blended organic juices high in fiber can actually be very filling. But I was cold, freezing most of the time. My solution was to cook the fresh pineapple and sauté the avocado-tomato medley (yes, they are fruits).

By the third day I didn’t go to my mixed martial arts class because I knew burning 1000 calories would leave me too hungry. I certainly wasn’t functioning with my full potential. The daily hour and a half of yoga was no problem but there was no strength for anything else. For this reason the cleanse was a bad idea.

However, my body did feel clean without any adverse effects. The day after the cleanse ended I simply had yogurt for breakfast. Being famished didn’t cause me to overeat.

Because I had been so hungry for so long and couldn’t appease the pangs, I have become much more conscious of eating. Even though I want to eat something, I now stop and think about it even more than usual. Eating somehow has become more of a choice and less of a necessity.

At a cocktail party I accidentally ate a chicken salad sandwich. After a month without meat, the taste seemed strange. I finished it even though I recognized my mistake after the first bite. I know I could live without meat. Unfortunately, I don’t think my kids could, partially because of the food allergies and partially because of their complete lament that we are only half-way done with this experiment.

As for the rest of my week of “restoration”, I learned to take it easy when necessary. The fruit cleanse forced me to skip my kickboxing so I did relax. Some of the yoga practices challenged my muscles and I realized I need to mix the difficulty of my practices. The 20 minutes of meditation seemed long at first, but it definitely forced me to learn to let go and begin again. Repeatedly pushing thoughts out of my head means I repeatedly feel the peace of the moment.

At one yoga practice we sent out our love and then felt the love in the room return to us. This probably seems pretty hokey to many people. This could even be held up as a reason never to try yoga but it was only for a moment. Consider how we exist in a state of never-ending emotions. Capitalizing on the best one can only make you feel better. I know the love from those I love in my life is the only way I am truly restored.

This post is part of a series on my 40 Days To Personal Revolution journey.

When you truly want to fit something into your life, you can.

A couple of years ago, Dave, the co-owner of Thrive Yoga, told me the participants in the 40 Days To Personal Revolution program not only find time to do their yoga but their energy level allows them to do much more in their life. At the time, I believed him but understood the process would be miraculous. It is. Setting your mind [...]]]>

When you truly want to fit something into your life, you can.

A couple of years ago, Dave, the co-owner of Thrive Yoga, told me the participants in the 40 Days To Personal Revolution program not only find time to do their yoga but their energy level allows them to do much more in their life. At the time, I believed him but understood the process would be miraculous. It is. Setting your mind on a goal and dedicating the time to make it happen may take up your time, but by not wasting it elsewhere and feeling rejuvenated, you can create more. I plan my yoga classes and everything else falls into place.

Think about how it feels to visit a new destination. You notice and observe every little detail. Everything’s a surprise. Even if you don’t know where you are going, it’s all new so each moment seems special and exciting. This is the true sense of discovery.

During the second week of Baptiste’s 40 Days program, the emphasis is on vitality but you don’t need to go somewhere exotic to rediscover and rejuvenate.

Because of the program, I discovered new teachers, poses, and food. Having to practice yoga 6 out of 7 days last week meant I spent more time in the studio and had two new instructors. The instructors introduced different challenges and poses. One had us in Down Dog so long I was in pain then she said “This is supposed to be a resting pose, right?[Laughter] I once had an instructor keep us in Down Dog for 10 minutes.” At least I wasn’t imagining the difficulty. Repetitious programs can dull your senses but because we all desire the familiar, we often stick to our same patterns and don’t shake up our lives. I’m being forced out of my usual yoga habits. I’d never seen the Bird of Paradise pose but after it was introduced last week, I practiced at home. The new poses, and several twists to old poses, clicked my brain into a higher gear.

When we started the 40 Days program, we were told we’d be excited to try new shops. At the time I didn’t think my journey would take me to any new stores. This week’s food theme was fresh food and my search brought me to the local seafood market which I had not visited in years. A new baked bluefish recipe called for apples and mushrooms and the family hasn’t stopped saying they want to eat it again.

Underlying the second week was a feeling I couldn’t quite put into words until I read The Key to Happiness: A Taboo for Adults? On the Huffington Post, especially these sections:

Researchers say that the more absorbed we are in activities we like to do, the happier we are. Abraham Maslow and Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi pinpointed the power of full involvement in the moment to produce optimal experiences. Maslow called optimal moments the time when we are most attuned, “more integrated and less split, more perfectly actualizing.”

Contrary to stereotype, engaged play is the gateway not to time-wasting but to times that let you contact deeper realms. When you paint a canvas or play volleyball, you’re in a creative improvisation that calls on inner fortitude and commitment and that reflect your values through self-expression. Play satisfies core self-determination needs, such as autonomy and competence, as little else can, connecting you with your mandate to explore and challenge yourself. That’s the integration Maslow was talking about. You tap the true you, not the performance identity of the job or the presentation identity that we display to others. Play relieves you of the burden to be someone you’re not. There’s nothing on the line; it’s just play. Just you.

With only one rest day, I have challenged myself and found the real me on my yoga mat. In the process, I’ve discovered a new level of satisfaction.

As for the coffee endeavor, I actually forgot to make it twice last week. And yes, I had a chuckle over the release of a supersized 31 oz. coffee from Starbucks while I’m trying to cut back. That’s a lot of coffee!

This post is part of a series on my 40 Days To Personal Revolution journey.

The American Council On Exercise recently did a study on hula hooping, but the information which caught my eye concerned kickboxing. When compared to power yoga, aerobics, Nia, pilates, and even these very popular “boot camp” programs, kickboxing stands out as the best exercise for getting your heart rate up and burning calories.

Although I practice yoga for the stretching, muscle tone, and other more spiritual benefits, my desire to hit and kick the bags has [...]]]>

The American Council On Exercise recently did a study on hula hooping, but the information which caught my eye concerned kickboxing. When compared to power yoga, aerobics, Nia, pilates, and even these very popular “boot camp” programs, kickboxing stands out as the best exercise for getting your heart rate up and burning calories.

Although I practice yoga for the stretching, muscle tone, and other more spiritual benefits, my desire to hit and kick the bags has consumed me for more than two years. I thought I’d been imagining the intensity of the full body workout from kickboxing. Apparently I’m not.

When someone says, “I feel like kicking something.” I say, “Come to the gym and do just that.” As a side benefit, you might be able to fend for yourself if attacked. We don’t practice knocking out someone’s knee then kicking them in the head for nothing. Double tap!

The one most important piece of advice is to find something you like doing, something you look forward to doing. If it’s the hula hoop then go for it! All exercise is good.

After almost 11 years of yoga practice, I’m timidly starting a Personal Revolution to kick off the New Year. Opening myself to new possibilities, I have no way of knowing what will happen.

As a gift for my birthday this month, my husband registered me for a program at Thrive Yoga based on Baron Baptiste’s 40 Days To Personal Revolution book.

For both my pregnancies my husband and I intensely prepared with the Bradley Method of Natural [...]]]>

After almost 11 years of yoga practice, I’m timidly starting a Personal Revolution to kick off the New Year. Opening myself to new possibilities, I have no way of knowing what will happen.

As a gift for my birthday this month, my husband registered me for a program at Thrive Yoga based on Baron Baptiste’s 40 Days To Personal Revolution book.

For both my pregnancies my husband and I intensely prepared with the Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth (that’s another post I need to write!). During my second pregnancy almost 11 years ago, I added a prenatal yoga class and never stopped practicing at home by myself with videos and instruction.

Stepping into an actual studio with people was a big step a few years ago. I have never enjoyed group physical fitness experiences but I found a home at Thrive Yoga, a special and peaceful place which takes you beyond the physical yoga practice. When I first talked to the co-owner Susan, she explained that her husband, Dave, had been in a bad car accident and her sister had died from cancer. When she looked at her life, she knew what was important so they started Thrive. This is a beautiful studio where you can go to handle the stresses from life and center yourself. The workshops and classes are all about a better, complete life.

Since Thrive Yoga already provides a transforming experience, the thought of a more intense study requires me to take an even deeper breath. I’ll admit I’m nervous. A year and a half ago, I talked to Dave about advancing in my yoga practice. Expecting an easy answer about the classes I should take, he suggested the intensive 40-day course. He said most people think they don’t have the time and this was exactly what I was thinking. Then my arm injury prevented me from even considering the possibility.

But here I am.

For six weeks the program works on your health. In addition to at least six yoga practices a week, we’ll meet weekly to talk about our eating habits and daily meditation. That’s body, mind, and spirit.

I need this now.

When I spoke with one of my spiritual advisors recently, he commented that I had said the same thing to him two years ago. He’s right. He was also right when he said I was doing too many things.

I must stand still and listen for a while.

This will mean I cut back on much of what I am doing. I have a painting sketched out on a big white canvas and I’m going to pick up those brushes again. Because I never thought I’d make a salary with my artwork, I discarded it. Truth be told, I’m not making a heck of a lot of money freelancing right now so I might as well be doing what I truly love. So yoga, diet, prayer, painting, and family will be my only priorities as I open myself to come apart. My husband said he can’t imagine a better time for me to do this, and he is right.

Although I am fortunate to have a local program to keep me focused, 40 Days To Personal Revolution provides a complete guide for anyone, anywhere. Even a beginner can follow the instructions for each yoga pose and benefit from the weekly readings.

Now if I can only get “You say you want a revolution” to stop repeating in my head.

May you find what you seek this year.

This post is part of a series on my 40 Days To Personal Revolution journey.

The newest science suggests that exercise alone will not make you thin, but staying thin requires exercise. Real exercise. You must work out.

In Weighing the Evidence on Exercise, Barry Braun, an associate professor of kinesiology at the University of Massachusetts states:

“When you look at the results in the National Weight Control Registry, you see over and over that exercise is one constant among people who’ve maintained their weight loss.” About 90 percent of the people [...]]]>  

The newest science suggests that exercise alone will not make you thin, but staying thin requires exercise. Real exercise. You must work out.

In Weighing the Evidence on Exercise, Barry Braun, an associate professor of kinesiology at the University of Massachusetts states:

“When you look at the results in the National Weight Control Registry, you see over and over that exercise is one constant among people who’ve maintained their weight loss.” About 90 percent of the people in the registry who have shed pounds and kept them at bay worked out, a result also seen in recent studies.

During the last few years I have slowly developed a well-rounded workout routine. I’ve never liked gyms because they seem so artificial. I don’t like to sweat though I’ve grown used to it lately. I do love to learn new pursuits. Going from a lazy slug to a fit individual has been a long journey. I’m still learning. But I think I’ve hit upon a good combination worth sharing. You might say I’m going down this path kicking and screaming, but here’s how:

1.) Running. When I realized walking wasn’t really helping to control my weight I started to run around the neighborhood. At first it was a half mile. Now I run 3 miles alternating between running as fast as I can then walking up hills to catch my breath. I was running five or six days per week exclusively, but now it’s usually one time to get the heart pumping in conjunction with my other activities. For two years my un-ending mantra with every footstep was “I hate running”. Lately I only think I hate it once or twice during a run. Recently I tried my first 5K but it wasn’t your ordinary race. The Run-A-Muck went through a lake and mud pit which left me completely dirty but extraordinarily pumped.

2.) Martial Arts and Kickboxing With A Trainer. I started kickboxing to lose the fat on my legs and sculpted my entire body. Originally I had a trainer in a martial arts studio while working to achieve belts, but she has moved away. Now at the absolute minimum I go to LA Boxing three times per week for an hour workout each time. LA Boxing claims their intense workout burns 1,000 calories. Kickboxing also requires a full body program beyond the martial arts, such as the 50 pushups I completed for my green belt. The trainers help you to tone your abs, arms, legs, back, and core. The best part is I’ve learned how to defend myself with both kicking and boxing as well as getting my body into good shape. You need to be quick on your toes and never stop moving when kickboxing, which also helps my running form. Jump kicks, leap frogs, lunges, squats, ab work, pushups, etc., the routine works on every part of your body until you feel like collapsing but you’re not allowed to stop moving. Once I found myself thinking I hated one of my instructors but then he yelled out “I know you hate me.” I keep going because I love the results.

3.) Yoga. For ten years yoga has been the mainstay of my weekly workout plan. Besides the mental health and high from each session, I now desperately need to stretch every part of my body after my other strenuous workouts. Yoga keeps my body in balance and helps me concentrate on what’s important in my life as well as keeping me physically well. Vinyasa improves my breathing while in motion, which is also important for my other physical endeavors. Also, my breathing is deeper, more cleansing. Right now I go to the Thrive Yoga once a week for an hour and a half, then practice solo once per week. After an injury which prevented me from doing my yoga, I realized I couldn’t live without it. Yoga is essential to every workout plan, brings great health, and prevents diseases.

Keeping the weight off has meant pushing my body beyond any notion I’ve ever had about working out and living with constant pain. I know I can’t stop. The recent research only encourages me to keep up my daily workout schedule.

The key is making it fun and social. In order to keep the weight off, find something you look forward to doing each day. For me it needs to be a variety. I need to balance the aggressiveness of kickboxing with the spiritual aspect of yoga and the cardio benefits of running. I’ve even combined the martial arts with yoga in a Budokon class. The important part is staying active.

Obviously I’ve built my workout over the course of six years. Listening to my body has led me to a complete routine. I pay attention to what I need and discovered a successful combination for my health and well-being.

But who knows, this summer I may start a completely different activity in conjunction with a more intense yoga practice. The trick is to keep it fresh and try new things, crazy things. Activities you watch and think you would never be able to do. That’s what will keep you happy and healthy.

What do you think you can’t do?

——————-

Part I of Weight and Exercising inspired by Gretchen Reynolds recent article, Weighing the Evidence on Exercise.

People are always surprised when I tell them I lost 50 lbs. without exercising. Turns out, as a woman, I probably had the best strategy.

Controlling my diet took all of my effort and resolve. Adding on any type of exercise, which I despised, was too much for me. I’d been to Weight Watchers twice – after college and after my first son’s birth. Now I had to lose the weight from my second [...]]]>

People are always surprised when I tell them I lost 50 lbs. without exercising. Turns out, as a woman, I probably had the best strategy.

Controlling my diet took all of my effort and resolve. Adding on any type of exercise, which I despised, was too much for me. I’d been to Weight Watchers twice – after college and after my first son’s birth. Now I had to lose the weight from my second pregnancy. Truth is, after giving birth and breastfeeding for a year, I’d gained another ten pounds When I tried to lose it on my own, I gained even more.

After discovering I was officially obese, I dragged myself to Weight Watchers. I sat at meetings for weeks without making any changes in my life. Eventually I beat back the internal conflict and convinced myself to do one thing. Just one diet change. After a while the small steps worked, but it took three years to lose all the weight.

While struggling to control my diet, I never attempted any physical activity. During the weight loss years, I would walk a bit. I tried the 10,000 steps per day with a pedometer but didn’t have the time. Since I had loved prenatal yoga, I would practice yoga with videos at least three times per week to obtain a state of well-being and good mental health. The walking and yoga weren’t really exercise and these activities were never intended for weight loss.

In Gretchen Reynolds recent article, Weighing the Evidence on Exercise, she backs up my method of avoiding strenuous workouts during weight loss. Up until now, scientists weren’t really sure how exercise affects metabolism and appetite but studies are starting to put the pieces together:

Barry Braun, an associate professor of kinesiology at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, in the American College of Sports Medicine’s February newsletter: The deficit in calories can result from cutting back your food intake or from increasing your energy output — the amount of exercise you complete — or both.

“The body aims for homeostasis,” Braun says. It likes to remain at whatever weight it’s used to. So even small changes in energy balance can produce rapid changes in certain hormones associated with appetite, particularly acylated ghrelin, which is known to increase the desire for food, as well as insulin and leptin, hormones that affect how the body burns fuel.

So when we change our diet for weight loss, our body signals eating more. We have to fight the urge to eat. It’s worse for women.

Female bodies, inspired almost certainly “by a biological need to maintain energy stores for reproduction,” Braun says, fight hard to hold on to every ounce of fat. Exercise for many women (and for some men) increases the desire to eat.

People end up consuming more calories when they exercise. You shouldn’t set yourself up to have to fight off an even stronger desire to eat. Take it from my experience, it’s better to change your eating habits permanently without burning the calories with exercise.

Tomorrow: Weight And Exercising: Part II – Exercise Is Mandatory To Keep Off  The Weight

A few months ago I started to feel sick at work with a headache. Convinced I was catching my son’s cold, I decided to go out for a run anyway. Miraculously, I felt better.

On a few other occasions this winter I’ve felt terrible. Convinced I’d be sick in bed within hours, I dragged myself out for my late-night kickboxing class then recovered. I’ve been telling everyone how my [...]]]>

Watch out when the stress blows in

A few months ago I started to feel sick at work with a headache. Convinced I was catching my son’s cold, I decided to go out for a run anyway. Miraculously, I felt better.

On a few other occasions this winter I’ve felt terrible. Convinced I’d be sick in bed within hours, I dragged myself out for my late-night kickboxing class then recovered. I’ve been telling everyone how my exercise must be boosting my immune system because I never wind up getting sick.

With the blizzards, I couldn’t travel to the gym. For six days my stomach was upset. I enjoyed my time with my family while trying to keep the ball rolling for a major fundraiser. With Washington DC snowed in for a full week, the hours were dwindling before the big event. Even though I had been ill for several days, I forced myself to an early-morning kickboxing class as soon as the roads were clear. When I came home I started to research my symptoms in fear of cancer. A short time later I was completely better.

When I was reading the medical book, the first cause of my symptoms was typed in bold letters: stress.

I had spent a week feeling sick because of stress. I still can’t believe I didn’t recognize it. My suffering had me worrying about a major disease. With my conscious effort to stay healthy, I can’t believe I didn’t know what was happening to me.

The realization that I was suffering from stress every time I thought I was sick floored me.

When I interviewed for my nonprofit job, I was asked how I handle stress. Fundraising under tight schedules with part-time hours and a strong desire to succeed is recognized for the stress it creates. Yoga and running on a daily basis had been a strong foundation to staying healthy but with work taking up additional hours, late-night kickboxing had to be added. Apparently, I can’t live without all these stress reducers.

But not all stress is bad. The American Institute of Stress describes it this way:

Increased stress increases productivity – up to a point, after which things rapidly deteriorate, and that level also differs for each of us. It’s much like the stress or tension on a violin string. Not enough produces a dull raspy sound and too much an irritating screech or snaps the string – but just the correct degree of stress creates a beautiful tone.

There are many signs of stress.  HelpGuide.org lists the physical ones as aches and pains, diarrhea or constipation, nausea, dizziness, and loss of sex drive. Keep a look out for these in your daily life.

Without intervention, my situation is making me physically ill. With this awareness, I need to make sure I find the ways to keep a good balance and stay healthy. Hopefully the weather or injuries won’t prevent me again.

I’m feeling a need to run right now.

For a year, I’ve been taking private kickboxing lessons with a group of middle-aged people who all admit to being out-of-shape. Recently our private lessons ended and we had to try the regularly scheduled classes at LA Boxing. I was apprehensive.

While wrapping up my hands before my first class, I heard one young woman say she was going to be 21 and her friend exclaimed she would be 23. I glanced behind me to see [...]]]>

For a year, I’ve been taking private kickboxing lessons with a group of middle-aged people who all admit to being out-of-shape. Recently our private lessons ended and we had to try the regularly scheduled classes at LA Boxing. I was apprehensive.

While wrapping up my hands before my first class, I heard one young woman say she was going to be 21 and her friend exclaimed she would be 23. I glanced behind me to see who they were. I realized my apprehension had a lot to do with my age.

Sometimes when I walk into this boxing gym I notice the other women look at me. In other gyms they might simply be noticing a fellow hamster in the wheel. But in the boxing setting, I have the distinct impression they’re sizing up the competition.

In the latest LA Boxing promotional video, friends won’t fight the guy in the LA Boxing t-shirt for the remote. He has a reputation. These instances always make me wonder if it’s right for me.

So what am I doing kickboxing anyway?

Marlow and Barbara fighting

Recently The Washington Post ran an article, Blood Sisters: Through boxing, two suburban women build a special bond in the ring. People asked me about the article. They wanted to know what I thought about fighting.

I’ve actually seen these women fight. They stood there and beat each other. They didn’t move. They didn’t block. They hit each other relentlessly. Word was, they were friends.

The article emphasizes their friendship but also the violence:

What’s a best friend if she can’t break your nose or bloody your face?

And in the 2 ½ years that Barbara Bartolomeo and Marlow Prado-Blankenship have been boxing together, they have blackened each other’s eyes, split lips and cracked nose. Later they giggle, displaying their wounds to friends who stare in disbelief, unsure how to respond. After all, what woman in their mid-40’s with husbands and children and sprawling, suburban homes in the Montgomery County community of Boyds beat each other for fun?

I started down the kickboxing path to get into shape and I’m certainly much more fit. In that first class I couldn’t help but notice I had more stamina than the two younger women. 

Being able to protect myself is certainly another benefit. This week a few guys were on the bags around me. I decided to pound out a few kicks to warm up. After my first “thump” they all whipped around to see who had delivered the blow. The confidence to know you can defend yourself is reassuring.

In the Post article, the women said they box to escape. The hard-hitting energy is a release. On more than one occasion, beating the bag has helped vent my frustrations. A friend mentioned having a bad day and feeling like kicking something. I know where you have perfectly legitimate excuse to do so.

One time we were sparring without gear which means you aren’t supposed to hit each other. My friend and I both accidently socked each other in the face at the same exact moment. The competition and aggression can easily get the best of you. I glanced at the clock to see how long my face would sting then experienced a solid ten minutes of pain. I’m pretty sure I don’t want to hurt someone or be hurt.

Every week I ache. I’m bruised. Most of the time I can’t lift my arms or legs. But I keep going back. I’m not fighting someone. It’s between me and the 150-lb. bag. I still worry about the perception of being a fighter.

When I was interviewing clients about their journey from homelessness to housing, one woman kept saying “I’m a fighter.” She had suffered from terrible depression and wound up on the streets hopeless, but she found strength and fought back. She was a fighter.

That’s the only kind of fighter I want to be.

For the first time in my life, I’m physically pushing myself beyond anything I have ever imagined. Muscles I didn’t even know existed all over my back, sides, shoulders, arms, and legs hurt constantly. Since I never [...]]]> While grunting with each move, I push myself to complete the rotations from my kickboxing instructor. As I finish the last one I invariably think “Wow, I can’t believe I just did that!” and she almost always yells “Again!”

For the first time in my life, I’m physically pushing myself beyond anything I have ever imagined. Muscles I didn’t even know existed all over my back, sides, shoulders, arms, and legs hurt constantly. Since I never seriously trained, and only half-heartedly exercised for most of my life, I had no idea about the pain involved with reshaping your body.

In class I have the reputation of repeating the instructions. She’ll say “jump rope – 5 minutes” and I’ll incredulously repeat “5 minutes?” Granted I can jump for 5 minutes but after 20 minutes of nonstop physical activity, I’m not happy about it. In fact, I hate working out and my body groans in agreement.

I thought people simply went through repetitious moves and their bodies looked better. Now I know why people say “No pain, No gain.” How could I have been so clueless?

Lots of people have been noticing the changes in my body. They ask questions about how I’m doing it. With my slug background, I’m asking myself the same questions and the answer is always “my trainer”. She’s a natural. Having left everything behind in Chile to move to the United States, Lyu Pollard is strong and driven, which rubs off on her students. As I’ve learned and struggled, I’ve realized her methods for improving my body apply to many situations in life.

How much better can I be doing this? My trainer’s heading to California to obtain a 5th degree black belt. All the martial arts are based on improvement. There’s always a next goal. Since she participates in our instruction, we are always training right along with her. The important lesson is thinking about a next level. Never accept the present situation. To be successful we need to constantly seek the next best thing in whatever we are doing then work toward it.

Haven’t I done enough? Since my trainer grew up with a military dad who made her wake up each morning at 5:30 AM and exercise, her demeanor resembles the sergeant’s program. We sometimes hear “Let’s go soldiers.” When we don’t want to do something or start to loose energy, we need motivation. I lack discipline, but my trainer insists on it. She’s tough and points out when we are slacking or taking the easy way out. “Not like that!” “Lift your leg higher, you’re trying to kick them in the face!” Constantly test yourself to see if you can do more and go further. You might be surprised by your own stamina and dedication.

Can’t I do this alone? My kickboxing instructor used to be a trainer in one of those fancy gyms. She knows all about the muscle sets and complete fitness. Sometimes we need specific help from knowledgeable people. If you can’t make yourself do what’s necessary to improve, then find someone who is qualified to push you in the right direction. Surround yourself with good people who know what they’re doing. This might mean joining Weight Watchers, Alcoholics Anonymous or Toastmasters. Perhaps you need a special course, a partner, or work mentor. My whole life I’ve viewed getting help as a weakness but I’ve finally learned to reach out to others. I lost 50 pounds with weekly Weight Watcher meetings because of the program and the people. Everyone in my kickboxing class is supportive. We cheer each other’s accomplishments because we are all struggling together.

After my first night of kickboxing I decided that if I could actually do her class, I would be in excellent physical shape. Underneath I didn’t think it was possible, but I keep showing up.

I’m learning more than I expected.

Kickboxing Classes are at the second floor studio at Rockville Martial Arts and Learning Center (just south of Woodmont Country Club entrance). Everyone is welcome to stop by and try a class for free, no pressure. There are monthly rates or less expensive long-term commitments. Believe it or not, I still pay by the month and could revert to being a slug at any moment!

In tenth grade Dominic dived into a quarry and never came up. His [...]]]> During a seventh grade dance Anthony told me that if I lost 50 pounds, I would be really good looking. He was a kind boy who had stopped girls from calling me names. He was trying to be helpful and give me advice. A year later he was killed in a car crash. I can still picture the coffin going down the aisle.

In tenth grade Dominic dived into a quarry and never came up. His mother had hand-sewn a dress as my birthday present in second grade. Then Maria’s house was on fire and although she came to the window and people yelled for her to jump from the second story, she went back to get her mother and they both died. I found out in advanced chemistry that morning when they made the announcement. She had been the lead in the musical and had a beautiful, unforgettable voice.

Lately I can’t stop thinking about them.

At 43 years of age I finally lost the 50 pounds, so I think about Anthony … then it snowballs. Anthony was right. I wish I hadn’t waited my whole life to feel so good about myself. I was so tired of being overweight. No matter what anyone says about accepting their weight and it not mattering, you feel like a failure when the methods exist to lose it to be healthy and you don’t. My greatest fear is that I will fall into a bad place and gain all the weight back, hence the constant training and exercising.

We don’t know how much time we have. If you feel bad about something in your life then change it — now. Find the epiphany moment before it is too late.

Often when people are interviewed they express surprise at deadly situations. Bad occurences never surprise me. I’ve always felt bad about taking them in stride. How could I do that? Clearly, a very long time ago, I accepted how life could be over in an instant. For good or for bad, it carries with me each day.

I only have five years until I’m the age of my father when he died. He didn’t have long. I might not either, and I don’t want to squander my time.

So I’m constantly asking myself, “What’s important?”